Secret Admirer
by Patch444
Summary: Kagu keeps being sent letters from her secret admirer, although the identity of her admirer may be more obvious than she believes. Oneshot.


It was late, the sun was setting across the land of Nippon. Kagura, popular child actress and miko of Sei-An City, had decided to take this time to go about doing her least favorite chore; answering her fan-mail. Kagu didn't hate getting fan-mail, on the contrary she loved receiving words of praise and admiration from her loyal fans, it was the matter of answering back to them that drove her nuts. Normally, Kagu would have eagerly sat down and gone to work, but today had been busy, filled with rehearsals for an upcoming play as well as practicing her miko powers, and she hadn't had the chance to. The young starlet was in her room, sitting at her desk near the window, bathed in the glow of a melting candlestick, in her pajamas, and holding a brush in her right hand. To her left stood a basket, filled with Kagu's responses to her adoring fans, and to the her right stood another basket, literally overflowing with yet to be answered fan-mail.

Kagu looked at the imposing tower of paper and sighed. She had been writing for over an hour and hadn't even put a dent in it. Kagu looked out the window, it was now dark, her parents were already asleep by now and most of the staff had gone home. Kagu had dark circles under her eyes, it wasn't easy being as popular as she was, but it was the life she had chosen to live. Two hours later, Kagu finally wrote her signature on her last fan-letter response, rolled it into a scroll, and dropped it into the basket. The young miko let out a sigh of relief, she was finally finished. As Kagu swung her legs off to the side of the stool, so as to get up, one of her legs accidentally bumped into the now empty basket, knocking it over. Kagu cursed under her breath as she sluggishly trudged over to the fallen straw vessel, picked it up, and set it down by the desk. She then retrieved the lid of the basket, which had fallen off, and was just about the put it back on, when she suddenly stopped. At the very bottom of the basket, rested a small scroll. Kagu was slightly puzzled. Hadn't she already read all of her fan-mail.

Ever curious, and now just wanting to go to bed more than ever, Kagu reached inside of the basket and pulled out the scroll.

_Probably just more praise for my recent performance_ she thought. Casually, Kagu unrolled the scroll and began to read it.

Her eyes widened. This wasn't a fan-letter!

It was...a love letter!

_The sun shines red,_

_ The water glows blue,_

_ But neither of these things,_

_ Are as pretty as you._

_ Signed, your secret admirer._

_ P.S._

_ This is not a prank._

Kagu thought for a moment. In actuality, it probably WAS a prank, probably sent by some trickster hoping to get a reaction out of her.

Still...it was a nice poem.

Kagu yawned. She would have more time to think about this tomorrow, and with that, she crawled into bed and fell asleep. As she did, however, she found that she couldn't get the thought of whoever sent that love letter out of her mind.

The next day, Kagu went about her regular routine; practicing her lines for the play, working on her makeup, and practicing her miko powers. At the end of the day, Kagu once again sat down in her room to begin answering her fan-mail. She had kept the love letter from last night on her nightstand. She also had read it over about five times but she still couldn't deduce who wrote it. Kagu continued to work on answering her fan-mail, keeping each response short and sweet. About halfway through the basket, however, she found yet another scroll, identical to the one from yesterday. Completely forgetting about the rest of her unanswered fan-mail, Kagu opened the scroll. This time, instead of the standard roses and violets poem, her "secret admirer" had chosen to write a simple haiku.

_Stars shine,_

_ Brightly in the night,_

_ Much like your eyes._

_ Signed, your secret admirer._

Kagu could feel herself blushing, did someone really think that her eyes shone like the stars?

She read the post script.

_P.S. _

_ Still not a prank._

Kagu frowned, whoever this guy was, whether he was pulling her leg or not was driving her crazy. Were the letters true, words of an honest confession of love, or were they just a joke that she was on the other end of?

There was only one way to find out.

The next day, Kagu hurried through her daily schedule, which wasn't any different than the previous two. When the time came to answer her fan-mail, Kagu didn't even bother reading any of her fan-letters. She just thrust her hand into the paper filled basket until her fingers closed around the metal casing of yet another scroll. Kagu opened it, more eagerly than she would have admitted later on, and began reading.

_How do I love thee?_

_ Let me count the ways;_

_ one is your voice,_

_ shrill yet sweet,_

_ two is your hair,_

_ smooth as sleet,_

_ three is your skin,_

_ white as milk,_

_ four is your dress,_

_ soft as silk._

_ I like you so much,_

_ I wish I could hug you,_

_ Because I like you the most,_

_ Dearest, Kagu._

_ P.S._

_ Again, not a prank._

Kagu certainly hoped not.

The next day, the second that she was finished with her schedule, Kagu ran into her room, shut the door behind her, and searched her fan-mail for hopefully another message from her secret admirer. Kagu smiled happily when she was finally holding a fourth scroll in her hand. She eagerly opened it, ready to be serenaded by the words of her admirer.

She frowned.

"Oh," she muttered.

Kuni was standing by a river bank in the forest, skipping stones across the water, when Kagu stormed into the clearing. She folded her arms.

"Hello, Kuni." she greeted, albeit not sounding very happy. Kuni was a little bit surprised that she hadn't called him "Nushi" like she usually did.

"Er, hey, Kagu," he responded, as he skipped yet another stone across the water's surface, with his back still turned to her, "what'cha been up to?"

"Oh, same ol' same ol'" Kagu answered, "you?" she

Kuni paused in mid-toss for a moment, then began tossing stones again. "Oh, the usual," he told her, "been adventuring, fighting demons, practicing my sword techniques, stuff like that."

"Oh,"

There was along moment of silence between the two of them. Finally, Kagu broke said silence.

"I got your letters."

Kuni froze, he dropped the stone that he was holding.

"I have no Idea what you're talking about" he calmly replied.

"This,"

Kuni glanced over his shoulder, his eyes nearly budged out of his head. Kagu was holding out the fourth scroll. Without speaking, Kuni quickly snatched it from her grasp and opened it.

"Nice poem," Kagu complemented, "were you drunk when you wrote it?"

"I'm too young to drink," Kuni answered, but he could see what Kagu meant. This poem was TERRIBLE! Compared to his last three poems, this one sucked!

_Mutt's markings are red,_

_ Nanami's hair is blue,_

_ If you haven't figured out who I am yet,_

_ Then your brain is doo doo._

Kuni hung his head.

"Only one person calls Pooch Mutt," Kagu stated, "and that's YOU."

Kuni scratched the back of his neck.

"What's the big Idea, anyway?" Kagu asked, suddenly sounding angry, "were you just sending those letters to mess with me? A prank?" She began walking toward Kuni, who in turn began backing away from her.

"N-n-no!" Kuni stuttered, "I-I didn't mean to make fun of you or anything! Honest!"

"So what then?" Kagu inquired, "did you ACTUALLY mean any of those things you wrote?"

Kuni blushed.

"W-well, um-" he began.

"You, idiot!" Kagu snapped. Suddenly seizing Kuni by the shoulders and pulling him in close. Kuni was so scared that he was trembling, there was no way out of this situation! He was doomed!

"This is what happens to people who mess with my emotions!" Kagu roared.

Kuni couldn't do anything, he was powerless! The young swordsman shut his eyes, awaiting whatever painful and horrific punishment Kagu had in store for him. But the pain didn't come. Instead, Kuni felt a warm sensation spread throughout his body. It was surprisingly nice. Kuni opened one eye and nearly fell over in shock.

Kagu had pulled him in and her lips were pressed against his.

Kagu was kissing him!

Kuni felt as if his brain had turned to mush and was flowing through his entire body, but not literally because that would be REALLY gross and would probably kill him. Kagu took this moment of opportunity to shove Kuni, sending him sprawling into the shallows in a great _SPALSH_!

"That's for calling me a doo doo brain," Kagu chuckled, "AND because all of my fan-mail piled up due to me spending so much obsessing over your letters."

Kuni regained his senses and glared at her.

"What gives!" he hollered, "you can't kiss me to lower my guard and then shove me into a river!" Water began dripping from Kuni's hair, "Oh, great, you managed to get my hair wet! THIS TAKES ME TWO HOURS IN THE MORNING!"

Kagu giggled before turing around and making a break for it, leaving Kuni to stew in his own anger towards her

"Thanks for the letters," she called out as she ran, "it was really sweet of you!"

"Hey!" Kuni yelled, "You can't just leave me here, sitting in a freakin' river!" He heard Kagu giggling, not too far away.

"UGH!" Kuni roared, "THE NEXT TIME I SEE YOU KAGU, YOU ARE SOOOO DEAD! YA, HEAR ME? DEAD!"

He sat down, folded his arms, then smirked and called out, "YOUR WELCOME FOR THOSE LETTERS. BY THE WAY!"

**I'll be honest, it almost made me BARF writing some parts of this story, but it was well worth it. Look forward to the next chapter of MNDWYA! I'm working on it!**

** Please review ;)**


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